Waiting for Xander and his Speedos.
Writer: Elin Hampton
Director: David Semel
What's the sitch?
Something seems to be eating members of the Sunnydale High swim team, leaving nothing but their skins behind. Only at Sunnydale High, huh? So what’s to be done? Answer: Xander and his Speedos to go under-cover in the swim team to find out what in ‘cod’s’ name is going on. Pretty soon he finds out the team members are being fed steroids by their dodgy coach, which is gradually turning them one by one into ravenous man-eating fish monsters. Xander escapes with out so much as a scale having grown while the coach tries to give Buffy to his fish-boys as they still have, uh, boy needs. But Buffy escapes and throws Coach to them instead. The fish-boys kill him, then escape out into the ocean and disappear.
What's the sitch beneath the sitch?
The metaphor is clearly about the use of steroids and other performance enhancing drugs in sports. Apart from that it’s nothing but a bit of daft fun.
Who's giving us the wiggins this week?
Creepy Coach and freaky fish-men.
Why it rocks
It’s essentially the gang solving a freaky school-based mystery ala Scooby Doo and is more in tune with the stories and tone of series 1. It’s actually quite refreshing – especially seeing as how Buffy is having a bit more fun and joking more here rather than just being all sad and mopey. The third act twist works quite well too.
There’s some great dialogue and one liners dotted throughout.
Cordy, Willow and Buffy’s reaction to seeing Xander come out (in slo mo) in his Speedos…and then Xander’s embarrassed, stumbling reaction when seeing them all staring at him.
Why it sucks
It’s all just very, very silly and fluffy and a bit of a weird episode to stick in right before the big season finale.
The fish-men monsters are a bit carp…I mean crap.
It's Buftastic
Cordelia talking to the fish-monster in the pool thinking its Xander (it’s not).
Dialogue to die for
Xander: It's officially nippy. So say my nips. ( I use this line all the time when it's cold. Thanks Xan.)
Cordelia: It's about time our school excelled at something.
Willow: You're forgetting our high mortality rate.
Buffy: I'm a swim groupie. Oh, yeah, you know, there's just something about the smell of chlorine on a guy. Oh, baby.
Xander (in his Speedos): I'm undercover!
Buffy: You're not under much.
Buffy: I think we'd better find the rest of the swim team and lock them up before they get in touch with their inner halibut.
Coach: Boy, when they were handin' out school spirit, you didn't even stand in line, did you?
Buffy: No. I was in the line for shred of sanity.
Buffy: Great. This is just what my reputation needs: that I did it with the entire swim team.
And another thing
John Carpenter favourite Charles Cyphers (Halloween/Halloween 2/The Fog/Escape from New York) plays the Coach.
Wentworth Miller (Prison Break/Resident Evil: Afterlife) plays swim team member Gage Petronzi.
Shane West (ER, LXG, Nikita) plays swim team member Sean.
How many stakes?
Something smells fishy. 2.5 (out of 5)
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