BUFFY 5.6: FAMILY

The final confrontation with Tara’s family


WRITER: Joss Whedon

DIRECTOR: Joss Whedon

WHAT’S THE SITCH?

Tara is preparing to celebrate her 20th birthday when out of the blue her family turns up – Dad, Brother Donny and Cousin Beth. It seems Tara may have been harbouring a dark secret for her family has come to take her home before some great evil inside of her emerges and wreaks havoc. At the same time, Glory discovers that in the previous episode she was fighting a Vampire Slayer. And so she recruits a bunch of nasty demons to go find Buffy and kill her as Glory considers fighting a Vampire Slayer herself to be beneath her. Meanwhile, Buffy has told Giles the truth about Dawn and that she is going to protect her ‘sister’ no matter what. They agree to keep the truth to themselves for the time being. Back to Tara, and afraid that Willow and the gang will see her for what she truly is she casts a spell to hide her inner evil from them. But when Glory’s demons attack the Magic Box the spell backfires with potentially lethal consequences.

WHAT’S THE SITCH BENEATH THE SITCH?

What is family? What is it that makes a family? That’s the main theme here. Is it just blood or is it something more? Joss definitely comes down on the latter. Family is more than just blood. And sometimes blood family can be no family at all, as is shown with Tara’s odious kin. Other themes are the subjugation of women through the excuse of tradition and the use of fear and the suppression of homosexuality as something wrong and evil.

WHO’S GIVING US THE WIGGINS THIS WEEK?

Glory, a bunch of pasty faced demons and the Maclay family.

WHY IT ROCKS

It’s a Joss ‘Written and Directed by…’ episode, so of course it rocks.

Tara. We finally get to know a bit more about Tara who’s been with the show for an entire season but has remained mostly a kinda vague character, as both Buffy and Xander admit to each other here. They like her. They know she’s a witch and that she and Willow are in love…but that’s it.

Amber Benson. As Tara, Amber is sweetness personified. She plays Tara as a quiet, insecure, loving girl who wouldn’t (knowingly) harm a fly…which makes what happens in this episode all the more hard to take. Her mousy demeanour and cute nervous stutter just wanna make you give her a hug. The Willow/Tara love story is arguably the best, sweetest and most meaningful love story the show ever did. And a big part of that is down to Amber.

Buffy and the gang closing ranks around Tara and facing down Tara’s dad. A great moment that gets to the heart of what this show is about and what Joss does best – writing about flawed but good hearted people coming together to create their own close knit family unit.

Willow and Tara’s cute floaty dance at the end.

WHY IT SUCKS

Not so much with the funny. For a Joss episode Family is pretty low on the laughs. And that’s ok because of what it is looking to do. But we do miss quality Joss-isms.

It’s a good, solid episode with a nice strong theme and nice performances. But that’s all it is, which is kinda shocking for a Joss two hander.

Riley continues his self indulgent feeling sorry for himself decline. C’mon, dude, get a grip.

ITS BUFFTASTIC

The Scoobies closing ranks around Tara (see clip at top) and the look on Tara's face as she realises. A truly heart warming moment.

DIALOGUE TO DIE FOR

Buffy: Nothing like getting your ass kicked to make your ass hurt.

Buffy: So any breakthrough on the identity of Miss Congeniality?
Giles: Well, I've narrowed it down some.
Buffy (seeing the stacks of books on the table): Your definition of narrow is impressively wide.

Giles (to Buffy and Xander): You're in a magic shop, and you can't think what Tara would like. I think you're both profoundly stupid.
Xander: Well we don't really know what kinds of things witches like. I mean, what are we going to get her, some cheesy crystal ball?
Giles: You bloody well better not; I've got mine already wrapped.

Glory: A Slayer? Oh God, please don't tell me I was fighting a Vampire Slayer! How unbelievably common. If I had friends, and they heard about this...

Mr. Maclay: You are going to do what's right, Tara. Now I am taking you out of here before somebody DOES get killed. The girl belongs with her family; I hope that's clear to the rest of you.
Buffy: It is. You want her, Mr. Maclay, you can go ahead and take her. You just gotta go through me.

Mr. Maclay: This is insane! You people have no right to interfere in Tara's affairs. We are her blood kin. Who the hell are you?
Buffy: We're family

AND ANOTHER THING

In this episode we discover that Tara's last name is Maclay.

By the time of this episode Buffy’s dad has descended in to a true scummy father who’s run off with his secretary to Spain and doesn’t even bother to speak to his children when their mother gets sick. Biological fathers in the Buffyverse do get a raw deal.

Amy Adams. Yep, bitchy Cousin Beth is played by none other than the lovely and talented multiple Oscar nominee Amy Adams.

HOW MANY STAKES?

Family Ties aren’t binding. 3 (out of 5)

BUFFY 5.5: NO PLACE LIKE HOME

“Out. For. A. Walk…Bitch!”

WRITER: Doug Petrie

DIRECTOR: David Solomon

WHAT’S THE SITCH?

Buffy has become convinced that her mom’s as yet undiagnosed illness is the result of a supernatural attack. After a suggestion by Willow, she casts a spell at home to see if there are any traces of dark magic around her mom and the rest of the house, which would indicate some sort of supernatural attack. And whilst in her supernatural induced state, Buffy sees things which make her believe that Dawn is not in fact her sister but is really something evil looking to do her and her mom harm. After leaving the house to go investigate further, Buffy soon has a confrontation at an old factory with a very pretty, very powerful, and also seemingly unhinged young woman in a striking red dress who appears to be torturing a captured monk. After the crazy young woman in red gives a shocked Buffy a good ass kicking, Buff just about manages to escape with the monk as the factory collapses down on top of the crazy lady with the red dress on. Outside now, the monk, about to breathe his last, just about manages to tell Buffy the shocking truth about Dawn before he croaks.

WHAT’S THE SITCH BENEATH THE SITCH?

My annoying kid sister really is evil! And so the sibling rivalry Buff feels against her lil sis boils over in this episode as she thinks she has uncovered Dawn’s secret – that she is in fact some evil interloper in to their family looking to do harm. Buffy is far too eager to accept this. You can tell she kinda hopes it’s true. Could she slay her own ‘sister’? She even goes as far as to rough the poor kid up some, hurting her arm. Oddly Dawn becomes rather cold and coolly detached after this assault. I know it adds to the mystery (ooh, is she really evil?) but somehow I think she’d be well and truly freaked out based upon what we’ve seen of her so far. However the turn of events at episode’s end will put Buffy in to a new dynamic with Dawnie which will ultimately see big sis do absolutely anything to protect troublesome lil sis.

WHO’S GIVING US THE WIGGINS THIS WEEK?

Glory aka The Beast: A devil with a red dress on.

WHY IT ROCKS

Glory. Clare Kramer plays Glory, a petite young blond girl in heels and striking red dress who’s clearly unhinged and immensely powerful with it. Oh, and enjoys sucking out people’s minds too. She’s cute. She’s wicked. She looks great in that dress. And she well and truly kicks Buffy’s ass. What is she? A demon? Something else? Time will tell. Love Glory. She’s one of my all time fave Buffy Big Bads. Just so much fun to watch not to mention very easy on the eye.

The spell Buffy casts to look for traces of dark magic around her house is very cool and shot in a weird and dreamy way. Love the fade in/outs of Dawn’s room with/without all her stuff in it. Reminds me of the Pang Brothers The Eye.

Giles in his darkish wizard outfit. And the long silent reaction from Buffy…leading to him taking it off. Funny.

Anya the sales assistant. Her wonderfully offhand rudeness to the customers is so funny. “Please go” she says after taking their money, leading to Xander having to explain to her some of the finer points of polite insincerity.

Love struck Spike. Okay, so this is the start of the truly Buffy-whipped Spike, but his adolescent behaviour is very funny and leads to one of the greatest Spike moments ever in this ep. “Out. For. A. Walk.” Pause. “Bitch.”

The Buffy/Glory fight. Buff seems to have truly met her physical match in another young blond girl not that unlike herself. In fact, Glory seems far more physically powerful, tossing poor Buff around like a rag doll. The fight is fairly brief but is quite brutal and high impact. Not exactly a graceful martial arts style fight of old, more just punch and bludgeon and throw.

The Dawn reveal. Ah, so this is how Buffy managed to have a sister we’d never heard of before. It all makes sense now. Joss, you ol’ devil, you.

WHY IT SUCKS

The opening fight with the vamp at the factory is pretty lame. The direction is flat, the blocking is uninspired and kinda slow. And Buffy spends far too much time quipping when she should of just staked the guy already.

Okay, I admit it. Dawn is intensely annoying in this episode. Still, didn’t like seeing her pushed around by Buff. Plus she does behave pretty immaturely for a 14-year-old.

ITS BUFFTASTIC

Spike’s “Out. For. A. Walk…Bitch!”

DIALOGUE TO DIE FOR

Buffy (pulling a loitering Spike out from behind a tree): What are you doing here, Spike? Five words or less.
Spike (counting the words off on his fingers): Out. For. A. Walk. (pauses, then uses his thumb) Bitch!

Anya (to a customer who just finished her purchase): Please go.
Xander: Anya, the Shopkeepers of America called. They wanted me to tell you that "Please go" just got replaced with "Have a nice day."
Anya: But I have their money. Who cares what kind of day they have?
Xander: No one. It's just a long cultural tradition of raging insincerity. Embrace.

Dawn: What are you doing?
Buffy: My boyfriend. Go away.

Dawn (entering Giles’s new magic shop): Check out all the magic junk.
Giles: Our new slogan.

Willow: I can't help it. I just have all this involuntary empathy for Dawn. Cuz she's, you know... a big spaz.

Willow (displaying an item she's just wrapped): Does this look right to you?
Anya: Sure. If you wrapped it with your feet.

AND ANOTHER THING

Clare Kramer who plays Glory appeared in Bring It On with Eliza Dushku who plays Faith in Buffy and Angel.

HOW MANY STAKES?

A Glory-ous 3.5 (out of 5)

BUFFY 5.4: OUT OF MY MIND

WRITER: Rebecca Rand Kirshner

DIRECTOR: David Grossman

WHAT’S THE SITCH?

Joyce has a strange and disturbing fainting fit and ends up in hospital. While at the hospital, Buffy discovers Riley has an abnormally fast heartbeat. After examining him the doctor strongly advises he checks in for tests and close observation but Riley is having none of it and he leaves. A worried Buffy meets up with Riley’s old Initiative buddy Graham who tells her that Riley has a potentially fatal condition brought about by all the experiments Maggie Walsh did on him and that if he doesn’t undergo an emergency procedure he will die. Buffy heads off to find a now AWOL Riley. She even enlists Spike to go looking in the old Initiative caves (for cash of course). However Spike double crosses Buffy and, hearing there’s an Initiative surgeon in town, heads to the hospital himself, Harmony in tow, looking to force the removal of his ‘sodding chip’ once and for all. Can Buffy find Riley in time and convince him to trust the government types and go have the life saving op? And can she stop Spike getting to the surgeon first and getting his chip removed?

WHAT’S THE SITCH BENEATH THE SITCH?

There’s a whole load of male machismo stuff going on here. Men feeling inferior to strong women and not being able to handle it. Riley would rather die than lose his extra power, which means he is just about able to keep up with Buffy. He loves her, sure, but she also intimidates him, makes him feel emasculated, less of a man, that he is the weaker one who needs looking after and keeping safe. And big tough soldier boy Riley can’t handle it. And then there’s Spike who is in a similar position. He’s powerless due to his chip. He’s reduced to being an occasional punch bag for Buffy, a figure of annoyance and ridicule, to the Slayer and her pals. And he’ll do anything to get back what he once had.

WHO’S GIVING US THE WIGGINS THIS WEEK?

Whatever is happening to poor Joyce. And, for the first time in ages, Spike. Yay!

WHY IT ROCKS

The theme. It works nicely and makes a good point about fragile male egos.

The old Spike. Finally, we get to see some of the old Spike again. Full of anger and bloodlust, excited to almost be back in the Slayer killing game. And James Marsters, as always, is fab.

Joyce. Poor Joyce has her first bad turn, which will lead on to bigger and far worse things.

Marc Blucas. He does a great job playing up Riley’s insecurities and paranoid state of mind. He really doesn’t look well in some scenes. A strong performance.

Witchy Willow. Willow is starting to use much more witchcraft on a casual basis. You can see it has Tara worried and is a nice foreshadowing of events in season 6.

Spike and Harm. They do make for a funny double act. A frustrated Spike playing twenty questions with Harm is an amusing highlight

WHY IT SUCKS

Sorry Riley, but this is not the most interesting story going. I like you but I’m really not that bothered about your macho insecurities. If I had a gal like Buff I wouldn’t be whinging about how much tougher she was than me. Oh woe is Riley.

After Buffy makes it clear she’d have to pay Spike to find Riley in the Initiative caves cuz she doesn’t know them at all, she manages to find him pretty easily after Spike double crosses her.

ITS BUFFTASTIC

That final scene where Spike discovers his true feelings for the Slayer. Like we didn’t see that coming.

DIALOGUE TO DIE FOR

Spike: I will know your blood, Slayer. I will make your neck my chalice... and drink deep. (turns around and pratfalls into an open grave) Ow!

Buffy (seeing the training room Giles, Riley and Xander have made her): You're like my fairy godmother, and Santa Claus, and Q all wrapped up into one. (they look at her) Q from Bond, not Star Trek.

Spike (watching Dawson’s Creek) Oh, Pacey! You blind idiot. Can't you see she doesn't love you?

Spike: OK. Is it bigger than a breadbox?
Harmony: No. Four left.
Spike: So it's smaller than a breadbox.
Harmony: Heh heh! No, only three.
Spike: Harmony... is it a sodding breadbox?
Harmony: Yes! Oh, my God. Someone's blondie bear is a Twenty Questions genius!

AND ANOTHER THING

This is the debut Buffy script by Rebecca Rand Kirshner who went on to write for the rest of Buffy's remaining seasons and for Angel too. A decent first script.

HOW MANY STAKES?

Stop whinging, Riley. 2.5 (out of 5)

BUFFY 5.3: THE REPLACEMENT

“Kill us both, Spock!”

WRITER: Jane Espenson

DIRECTOR: James A. Contner

WHAT’S THE SITCH?

A glowy faced demon called Toth is gunning for the Buffster and attacks her at the city dump. But Xander gets in the way and the demon’s energy blast knocks him flying. Toth flees and a dazed Xander is retrieved by his friends and taken home. However, later on, a second Xander awakens in the same spot at the dump where first Xander fell. Second Xander is all nervous and afraid and accident prone. He rushes off, only to find the other Xander appears to be living his life better than him. Other Xander seems more confident, more sure of himself, able to get what he wants. After a brief confrontation between the Xanders they each rush off to seek help, shocked by the encounter and convinced that the other is a demonic imposter. Confident Xander beats nervous Xander to Buffy so nervous Xander goes to see Willow. Both Buffy and Willow believe their Xanders are the ‘real’ Xander. In the meantime, nervous Xander, afraid for Anya, rushes off to stop his ‘imposter’ from meeting Anya at the new apartment he is renting. Meanwhile Buffy and Willow meet up with Giles who figures out what has happened. It seems Toth wanted to split the Slayer in to two separate physical personas: the first would be entirely human, while the second would be entirely slayer. Kill the human and the slayer part could not survive alone. Worried for Xander(s) the gang rushes off to stop him…them from doing something drastic and potentially fatal.

WHAT’S THE SITCH BENEATH THE SITCH?

Ah, the old doppelganger/split personality tale. Trek did it brilliantly with the classic The Enemy Within (which this ep amusingly references in a roundabout way). Buffy even did it already…sort of…with Vampire Willow. Its one of those great genre staples that most shows will get around to doing at some point. And why not? It can make for great dramatic possibilities, a great chance to break down the human psyche, to see what makes us tick. Or, if you’re Buffy the Vampire Slayer, just an excuse to get Nick Brendon to act goofy and make the audience laugh. It’s a nice way to look at Xander in his many aspects – goofy nerd, witty charmer, loving boyfriend, loyal friend, confident young man, frightened child. But let’s not get too deep here. Mostly The Replacement is just an excuse for a Xander comedy episode. And that is perfectly fine. Two Xander’s for the price of one. Cool.

WHO’S GIVING US THE WIGGINS THIS WEEK?

Toth

WHY IT ROCKS

It’s a Xander comedy episode written by the great Jane Espenson. What more do you need? Okay, specifics…

The Snoopy Dance. To prove to Willow he’s the real Xander, Xander tells her how every Christmas they get together and Watch A Snoopy Christmas and Xander always does the Snoopy Dance for her…which he goes on to demonstrate.

Nicholas Brendon. He does a great job portraying both Xanders (as does his real life Twin brother Kelly) and once more proves what a gifted comedy actor he is.

Anya wanting to keep the two Xanders for a while to engage in some unspecified sexual exploits. Needless to say the gang says no.

Xander owns a set of Babylon 5 commemorative plates.

Riley’s confession to Xander at episode’s end is kinda sad and ends what was a fun frothy episode on an unexpected but effective downer.

WHY IT SUCKS

This is essentially the last proper Xander comedy episode the show ever did. And that sucks.

IT’S BUFFTASTIC

The Snoopy Dance

DIALOGUE TO DIE FOR

Xander: I wish I had something food-like to offer you guys, but the hot plate's out of commission.
Anya: We think the cat peed on it.

Xander: Yeah, maybe it's definitely time to start looking for a new place. Something a little nicer. Buffy, you've been to Hell, they have one-bedrooms, right?

Riley: (at the City Dump): What are you doing here, Spike?
Spike: Oh, there's a nice lady vampire who's set up a tea room over by the next pile of crap. What do you think I'm doing?

Lame Xander: But I never help. I get in trouble and Buffy saves me.
Willow: That's not true! Sometimes we all help to save you.

Buffy (about the two Xanders acting quite alike): They're kinda the same now.
Giles: Yes, he's clearly a bad influence on himself.

Giles: We just need to arrange the candles. Also, we should pretend we heard none of the disturbing sex talk.
Willow: Check. Candles and pretence.

Anya (about the spell to rejoin the Xanders): Well, what do we do if it doesn't work?
Both Xanders (shouting together geekily) KILL US BOTH, SPOCK!

AND ANOTHER THING

The Babylon 5 plates Xander says he owns do not exist. They were planned but never produced. Shame.

Nicholas Brendon has an identical twin brother called Kelly Donovan who doubles him in several of the scenes in this ep thus not needing split screen. The brothers’ last name is actually Shultz; Donovan and Brendon are their middle names.

HOW MANY STAKES?

Two Xanders for the price of one. 3.5 stakes (out of 5)

BUFFY 5.2: REAL ME

WRITER: David Fury

DIRECTOR: David Grossman

WHAT’S THE SITCH?

About to go off on a days training session with Giles, Buffy gets burdened by her mom with taking her little sister, Dawn, with her. To say that Dawn is an annoyance to the Buffster would be a wild understatement. Young Dawnie hates having to tag along with Buffy too, finding her older sister equally as annoying and frustrating; hating that Buffy is seen as being so special. Ironically Buffy sees Dawn the same way, for being ‘the baby’ and getting special treatment from everyone, especially their mother. Anyway, the gang stumble upon the murdered owner of the Magic Box shop and Dawn has a run in with a freaky man who tells her she doesn’t belong. It soon transpires that good old Harmony, vamped at the end of season 3, is back in the ‘dale and putting her own vampire gang together with one single aim: kill the Slayer. Problem is Harmony is kinda rubbish at being evil. But a trip to Buffy’s house sees her accidentally invited in by Dawn, which goes and unleashes Buffy’s fury on her lil sis. Later on, Dawn, upset at being belittled by her sister runs off…only to be kidnapped by Harm and her gang. It’s left to Buffy to track down Harm’s lair and save her lil sis before she becomes an undead all you can buffet.

WHAT’S THE SITCH BENEATH THE SITCH?

The title ‘Real Me’ refers to both Dawn and Harmony and how they think the world doesn’t see who they really are. Dawn is frustrated at being ‘the baby’ and always being in the shadow of her big sister. A large part of this episode is told from Dawn’s pov using her voiceover delivered diary entries where she vents her frustrations. Harm, meanwhile, is back to prove a point. She is still angry about how Spike treated her last season and is looking to unleash the badass within, to show him “the real me”. Dawn’s excuse is she is going through the usual teenage angst thing where the whole world is against her and everything is so unfair. The irony being we will soon find out that she is actually more than she seems. Unfortunately for poor Harmony she really is what she seems, no matter how hard she tries not to be. She’s trying to be a big bad. But she’s not. She’s still the same shallow, ditsy girl who’s not exactly blessed with a great deal upstairs. And of course the Buffster kicks her ass, though (thankfully) she does live to bite another day.

WHO’S GIVING US THE WIGGINS THIS WEEK?

Well, I guess its Harm. And possibly her ‘minions’, though they never pose any real threat. Some (unkindly) would say Dawnie was the real horror here. But not me. I always liked Dawn, even when she was being whiney and angsty. Like Willow, I kinda identified with her because, as the red head Wiccan says, “She’s a bit of a spaz.”

WHY IT ROCKS

Michelle Trachtenberg. Michelle plays young Dawn and I think she does a great job. Yes, she can be whiney and brattish, but that’s what the character demands. That’s what kids can be like. And some adults too. But Michelle always made Dawn sympathetic and turned in strong performances.

Harmony. Mercedes McNab plays the shallow, ditsy, rather vacuous vampire almost too well. Harm is hilarious, especially when she’s trying to be a badass. She’s not scary, just kinda pathetically cute. No matter what she does, how bad she tries to be, you always feel sorry for her. She engenders so much empathy for an ‘evil’ character. It’s a testament to Joss and to the casting people that they found these excellent supporting players who could capture the characters essences as well as the show’s odd and offbeat tone with so much apparent ease.

Giles and his new car. Yep, Giles has gone and got himself a red convertible sports car, though he doesn’t seem to be getting along with it too well. The scene with Giles, Buffy and Dawn in Giles’ car on their way to the Magic Box is very good and very funny. The easy chemistry between Tony Head and SMG is charming as she teases him about his new sporty acquisition.

Xander, Anya and Dawn playing The Game of Life…and Anya realising she is winning…and then gleefully offering to swap her children for more money. Heh. Once more Emma Caulfield proves how damn funny she is.

WHY IT SUCKS

Buffy hates Dawnie. I know this is all about setting up the relationship and raising the stakes for what Buffy will have to do and what she’ll eventually have to give up later in the season, but her continual ragging on poor Dawnie borders on outright bullying. She seems to almost take gleeful pleasure in putting the kid down every chance she gets. It’s an aspect of Buff’s character you can easily not like. Yes, Dawnie can be annoying. But she IS just a kid. She IS gonna mess up. But when she’s treated with respect and affection she comes across as perfectly sweet. It’s great to see here the obviously close relationship she has with Willow, seeing Willow as more of a big sister than her actual big sister. This is a relationship which will carry on right through the series and in to the comics.

Though pretty funny and providing a decent introduction to young Dawn as well as introducing a couple of tiny clues to the bigger season plot, ‘Real Me’ is a rather limp story. I like Harmony but she provides no real threat or menace. And neither do her minions. And the episode doesn’t really amount to much in the end.

IT’S BUFFTASTIC

I think I’ll go for The Game of Life scene. Anya is so damn funny when she realises she’s winning and Dawnie is sweet as she gazes dreamily at Xander, hoping he’ll see her as a woman, while in fact Xander sees her as she truly is: a cute little kid with ice cream all over her mouth.

DIALOGUE TO DIE FOR

Giles (angrily, gears crunching): Just not used to automatic transmission. I loathe this just sitting here, not contributing. No, no, no, it's just not working out.
Buffy: Giles, are you breaking up with your car?
Giles: Well, it did seduce me. All red and sporty.
Buffy: Little two-door tramp.

Anya: Crap! Look at this. Now I'm burdened with a husband, and several tiny pink children, more cash than I can reasonably manage.
Xander: That means you're winning.
Anya: Really?
Xander: Yes, cash equals good.
Anya: Ooh, I'm so pleased! (claps happily) Can I trade in the children for more cash?

Buffy: No, but, see, Mom, that doesn't really work for me. We're just going to the magic shop, no school supplies there.
Dawn: Yeah, Mom. I'm not going to Hogwarts. (chuckles) Hog— (looks at Buffy, who's not amused) Jeez, crack a book sometime.

Dawn (voice-over): I don't think Buffy's Watcher likes me too much. I think its 'cause he's just so... old. I'm not sure how old he is, but I've heard him use the word "newfangled" one time, so he's got to be pretty far gone.

Dawn (voice-over): Like Tara. She and Willow are both witches. They do spells and stuff, which is so much cooler than slaying. I told Mom one time I wish they'd teach me some of the things they do together. And then she got really quiet and made me go upstairs. Huh, I guess her generation isn't cool with witchcraft.

Buffy: How bored were you last year?
Giles: I watched Passions with Spike. Let us never speak of it.

AND ANOTHER THING

Michelle Trachtenberg and Sarah Michelle Gellar were friends before Michelle joined Buffy. It was SMG who suggested Michelle for the role of Dawn as they’d worked together before on the daytime soap All My Children and had become quite close. So there was already a big sister/little sister thing going on. They’ve remained friends since.

Michelle Trachtenberg was a massive fan of the show before being cast as Dawn. She’d said joining Buffy was like a dream come true.

Harmony’s minion Cyrus is played by Tom Lenk Tom went on to play uber nerd Andrew in Buffy seasons six and seven and a couple of episodes of Angel season five. He also has a role in Joss and Drew Goddard’s 2012 movie The Cabin in the Woods.

HOW MANY STAKES?

Lay off the kid, Buff. 3 (out of 5)

BUFFY 5.1: BUFFY VS DRACULA

Teaser for the episode

WRITER: Marti Noxon

DIRECTOR: David Solomon

WHAT’S THE SITCH?

The start of season five sees the Buffster hanging out with her best buds, enjoying the beach and taking in the sun…only for their fun day to be rudely interrupted by the arrival of worrisome black clouds and a sudden storm. What can this strange dark storm coming in from the sea mean? Well, pretty soon Buff finds out as she comes face to face with the most legendary vampire of them all: Count Dracula himself. Seems Drac has come to Sunnydale in search of Buffy as he feels she is someone who is worthy of being one of his disciples, of learning all of his dark secrets. You see, unlike other vamps the Count has special powers. He can mesmerise, he can transform to mist and in to a wolf and a bat. He also doesn’t seem to go all bumpy fore headed either. Spike puts it all down to old gypsy magic and that Drac’s really just a big ponce who still owes him money. But the Count does seem to have genuine power and he does manage to get Buffy under his thrall, as well as poor Xander, turning the poor guy in to a gibbering, bug eating Renfield figure. Can Buffy resist the Counts charms and his promise to reveal her true potential and the true source of her power? Can Xander stop eating bugs? Can Giles escape the lethally erotic embrace of the three brides of Dracula? And where the hell did that castle come from? And who is that young girl right at the end that Buffy’s mom says is Buffy’s sister? Whu?

WHAT’S THE SITCH BENEATH THE SITCH?

Though Buffy vs. Dracula is mostly just a fun, action packed, entertaining opening to season five, it does contain introductory elements to what will be two of the main themes of this season. First, finding the true person within, who you really are, where your power comes from and how best to use it. Second, taking individual responsibility for yourself and others, breaking free of parental ties to stand on your own two feet in life.

WHO’S GIVING US THE WIGGINS THIS WEEK?

The Count of course. MWAHAHAHAHA!

WHY IT ROCKS

Subverting a legend. Buffy vs. Dracula covers a lot of the beats of the original story with Dracula as the strange outsider coming to town to prey on cute young women while his prime target's boyfriend and older authority figure (Jonathan Harker and Van Helsing in the book, Riley and Giles in the ep) set out to save her and kill Drac. But BtVS is a feminist empowerment show and although Drac does get to tempt her Riley and Giles don't get anywhere near saving her. It is Buffy herself who is tough enough to break the Count's spell and then kick some Dark Prince ass.

The Count. Rudolph Martin plays Dracula and he does a great job. It is a low key and enigmatic performance. Martin plays the Count as a quiet seducer, all eyes and silky words and subtle gestures. The same year the normally excellent Gerard Butler was miscast as Dracula in the god-awful Dracula 2000. Rudolph Martin gives the far superior performance.

Xander goes Renfield. Pure genius turning Xander in to the crazed bug eating manservant of the “unholy prince…bator.” Nick Brendon is clearly having tons of fun acting nuts and swallowing bugs anywhere he can. His manic giggles are most amusing. As is his reaction at episodes end when he returns to normal and is justifiably furious about what happened to him.

The mythology of Dracula. The episode plays with many of the classic elements of Dracula myth – his arrival in a storm, residing in a castle, coffins full of earth, changing in to a bat and a wolf and mist, his three seductive brides, the fact he kept coming back to life in sequels. And the ep has fun with all these things. I especially enjoyed Giles ‘struggling’ against the attentions of the three comely vampire brides. “Oh, my shoe…” Heh. The ep manages to seamlessly weave Dracula in to the crazy world of the Slayer and makes his presence here feel…right.

The Funny. Marti Noxon wrote a really good and funny script that’s part spoof, part homage, part satire and part meaningful character development for our girl. There are lots of great lines too. Most of ‘em Xander’s.

WHY IT SUCKS

A bit throwaway. To employ such a huge and mythic character as Dracula and then dispose of him 44 mins later feels kinda wrong. Drac deserves better. But at least we know from the official continuation in the comics (season 8) that Drac is still around and is still kinda friendly with Xander. Like Buff says, he always comes back.

ITS BUFFTASTIC

Well, I loved seeing a real, genuine, and honest to god wolf on the prowl in Sunnydale as opposed to those hairy monkey werewolf things. But in the end, I gotta go with Xander and his “Dark Master…bator” line and its follow up line. Classic!

DIALOGUE TO DIE FOR

Xander: (unable to light a fire on the beach) It's comforting to know that I lack the culinary finesse of a caveman.

Buffy: Who are you?
Dracula: I apologize. I assumed you knew. I am Dracula.
Buffy: (wide eyed) Get out!

Buffy (to Dracula): And you're sure this isn't just some fanboy thing? 'Cause I've fought more than a couple pimply, overweight vamps that called themselves Lestat.
Xander: No, we're not going to (imitates Dracula's accent) leave you. And where'd you get that accent Sesame Street? One, two, three — three victims. Mwah, ha, ha, ha!

Willow: A good Sunnydale rule of thumb — avoid white-skinned men in capes.

Xander: Like any of that's enough to fight the Dark Master. (They look at him) Bator.
Xander: See?! Buffy didn't feel it. I think you're drawing a lot of crazy conclusions about the Unholy Prince! (They look at him) Bator.

Riley: I've lived in Sunnydale a couple of years now. Know what I've never noticed before?
Giles: Uh, a castle?
Riley: A big, honking castle.

Buffy: You think I don't watch your movies? You always come back. (Dracula begins to materialize again.) I'm standing right here!

Xander: Where is he? Where's the creep that turned me into a spider eating man bitch?
Buffy: He's gone.
Xander: Damn it! You know what? I'm sick of this crap. I'm sick of being the guy who eats insects and gets the funny syphilis. As of this moment, it's over. I'm finished being everybody's butt monkey!
Buffy: Check. No more butt monkey.

AND ANOTHER THING

Buffy vs. Dracula is the first Buffy season opener not written by Joss Whedon.

Change of stunts and music. Long time Buff composer Christophe Beck left the show and was replaced by the gigglesomely named Thomas Wanker. Long time stunt co-coordinator Jeff Pruitt also left (along with long time SMG stunt double Sophia Crawford – Pruitt’s wife) and was replaced by John Medlen.

Emma Caulfield gets added to the opening credits.
In the mid-nineties Rudolph Martin played Sarah Michelle Gellar's lover in daytime soap All My Children.

HOW MANY STAKES?

I Count 4 lovely stakes (out of 5) MWAHAHAHA!