BUFFY: 7.1 “LESSONS”

Big Bads are back!


WRITER: Joss Whedon

DIRECTOR: David Solomon

WHAT’S THE SITCH?

In Istanbul, Turkey a young girl is chased through the streets by a group of creepy looking people in cloaks before being caught and brutally killed. Back in Sunnydale and it's a new school year and Dawn is starting at the all new Sunnydale High 2.0 which has been built on the site of its exploded predecessor. However, based upon her own experiences at the school's previous incarnation, Buffy is having a serious case of the nerves about her lil sis starting at the new Sunnydale High. At first Dawn thinks her big sis is being way too over protective and is worrying needlessly but a run in with a group of apparently vengeful spirits soon has Junior Summers and some new friends calling for emergency Slayer assistance. Meanwhile in England a remorseful Willow is learning to be herself again under the tender tutelage of Giles.

WHAT’S THE SITCH BENEATH THE SITCH?

On one hand this episode is about fear. Fear of the past, the future, the unknown. Fear that your own life experiences, your own past will repeat and come back to haunt those you love and are responsible for. Buffy is afraid for Dawn. She is scared that Dawn will suffer the same high school traumas she did. But Buffy also knows that that is often unavoidable in life and that all you can do is to prepare youngsters as best you can before sending them out there, which is what she does by training Dawn in how to handle a vampire by herself. But Buffy also knows enough to let Dawn know to never be afraid to ask for help if she needs it as is shown by the cell phone she gives Dawn as a gift at the start of the Ep. and which comes in very useful later on. On the other hand this episode is also a short presee of what this entire season will be about: Power. Finding it, sharing it and using it.

WHO’S GIVING US THE WIGGINS THIS WEEK?

Sunnydale High's vengeful spirits who seem to blame the living for their unnatural deaths and want to make them all suffer.

Creepy robed people hunting and killing a young girl.

An evil entity who appears to loony basement living Spike by taking on the forms of all previous Buffy Big Bads (minus Angelus) as well as, finally, the form of the Buffster herself.

WHY IT ROCKS

It is a Joss script so has some solid thematic depth, strong character work, funny moments and also sets up where everybody is both physically and emotionally while also laying the thematic and story groundwork for the rest of the season.

Director David Solomon manages to create at least two genuinely effective jump scares.

James Marsters gets to play a credibly loony Spike.

All previous Big Bads cameo (with the exception of Angelus) – great to see them again.

Cell phones finally make it to Sunnydale.

Buffy gets to make an effective weapon out of a handbag and some bricks and then wields it in a short but pretty cool fight scene.

Willow and Giles in England. Yes, actual real England.

WHY IT SUCKS

The basic story of the vengeful spirits at the school is pretty thin and in and of themselves they are not very scary.

This Ep. has a lousy phlebotnum i.e. "any magical or mystical force or event that arises in the process of inventing the Buffy mythology/or advancing the plot". It is just some random talisman Buffy finds lying around in the school bathroom which needs to be broken in order to vanquish the spirits. No explanation is ever given as to what it is or where it comes from or who put it there.

After a nice establishing matte shot the streets of Istanbul are clearly that overly familiar 'generic foreign town' set on the Universal back-lot.

IT’S BUFFTASTIC

The end monologue of the evil entity to poor nutty Spike as it lays out what it wants and what is to come while purposefully transforming from one previous Big Bad to another, ending finally as Buffy herself, telling Spike that none of this is about right or wrong, it is about power!

DIALOGUE TO DIE FOR

Xander (To Buffy): "The last two principals were eaten. Who’d even apply for that job?"

Vampire (to Buffy & Dawn whilst trying to get out of his grave): “Excuse me. I think I'm stuck.”

Buffy (after Xander asks how she is): “My sister's about to go to the same high school that tried to kill me for three years. I can't change districts, I can't afford private school, and I can't begin to prepare for what could possibly come out of there. So peachy with a side of keen, that would be me.”

Buffy (to Dawn): “Oh, we have to leave, though. Do you have everything? Books? Lunch? Stakes?”

Drusilla (to Spike): "That's where we go."
Master: "Right back to the beginning. Not the bang, not the word- the true beginning. The next few months are going to be quite a ride, and I think we’re all going to learn something about ourselves in the process. You’ll learn you’re a pathetic schmuck, if it hasn’t sunk in already. Look at you. Tried to do what’s right. Just like her... You still don’t get it. It’s not about right, not about wrong..."
Buffy: "...it’s about power."

AND ANOTHER THING

Joss wrote this episode but did not direct. He only wrote and directed one episode this season – Chosen, the series finale. He was kinda busy with a little show called Firefly.

Dawn's school friend Kit is played by Alexandra Breckenridge who most recently played Jessie Anderson in seasons 5 & 6 of AMC's the Walking Dead.

The character of Principle Wood as played by DB Woodside was written as gender non specific and with the gender neutral name of Robin Wood as Joss didn't know at the time what they were going to do with the character. It was only after casting DB Woodside that Robin Wood became male and developed the back story he would go on to have this season.

The scenes of Willow and Giles in England were indeed shot in England. Joss, Alyson Hannigan and her soon-to-be hubby Alexis Dennisof were in England in summer 2002 and were staying with Tony Head at his home just outside Bath. The house and the land you see in the scenes are Tony Head's actual house and farmland.


HOW MANY STAKES?

It's a hard lesson so 3 stakes (out of 5)

BUFFY 6.22 ‘GRAVE’

The Dark Willow story

WRITER: David Fury
DIRECTOR: James A. Contner

WHAT’S THE SITCH?

Giles is back! He battles Dark Willow and manages to best her…temporarily. But soon Willow is free again and forcing Buffy to take off after Xander, Dawn, Andrew and Jonathan to save them from a seeking fireball Willow launched after them. Buff saves them just in time, but gets herself and lil sis trapped below ground in a collapsed section of graveyard. Meanwhile back at the Magic Box and Giles lies beaten and broken, the store in ruins, Anya by his side. Willow drained him of all his borrowed power and in doing so she became connected to every living thing on Earth. Being dark still she focuses in on every human being’s pain. And determined to end that pain, she decides to destroy the world!

WHAT’S THE SITCH BENEATH THE SITCH?

It’s all about the pain. What else in a Joss Whedon TV show?

WHO’S GIVING US THE WIGGINS THIS WEEK?

Dark Willow

WHY IT ROCKS

Giles is back! ‘nuff said.

Have a laugh: Buffy is so happy to see Giles and unloads on him all the grief that has happened to her and the gang in his absence. Giles stares at her with quiet sombre concern…only to then break in to uncontrollable laughter at the insanity of it all. Buff quickly joins him. And it is most amusing.

Spike: the platinum vamp, bloodied and bruised, completes the trials and gets what he wanted.

WHY IT SUCKS

Huh?: Okay, so I get what they were aiming for with this series finale – bringing our characters back to simple emotional truths about themselves and each other, having them realise what growing up is really all about. BUT… it gets fluffed. Xander stopping Willow and saving the world by saying “I love you” and reminding her about a yellow crayon she broke in kindergarten? Really? And Buffy’s realisation that she doesn’t want to be protecting Dawn from the world but wants to be showing it to her is beyond cheesy. The dialogue is pure bad soap opera.

Evil temple: So there is apparently a conveniently buried satanic temple on a cliff top which Willow can raise up and use to destroy the world. Um…okay. That came from out of nowhere. Talk about handy last minute plot contrivance. Sigh.

ITS BUFFTASTIC

Giles and Buff having a good ol’ laugh

DIALOGUE TO DIE FOR

Willow: "Uh-oh. Daddy's home. I'm in wicked trouble now."
Giles: "You've no idea.”

Buffy: "Everything's been so.. Dawn's a total klepto, Xander left Anya at the altar and Anya became a demon again. And I.. I'm so.. I've been sleeping with Spike."

Anya: "Giles? Giles! Don't die.. not yet. I.. there are.. I need to tell you... Thanks a lot for coming. I mean, it was nice of you to teleport all this way.. Though, in retrospect, it might have been better if you hadn't come and given her all that magic that made her ten times more powerful.. that would have been a plus."

Willow: "Is this the master plan? You're going to stop me by telling me you love me?"
Xander: "Well, I was going to walk you off the cliff and hand you an anvil, but it seemed kinda cartoony."

AND ANOTHER THING

Grave marks the first (and only) Buffy series finale not to be written and directed by Joss Whedon. And you can tell. Joss was busy with Firefly at the time and only wrote one episode this season - Once More, With Feeling. But boy, what an episode.

If you look closely at the devastated Magic Box, there's a smouldering William Shatner book on the floor. Poor charred Shatner.

The song played at the end of the episode is Prayer Of St. Francis, by Sarah McLachlan and is a rare track which appeared on the bonus disc originally included with the limited edition double CD release of her Surfacing album in 1997.

HOW MANY STAKES?

Not quite ready for the grave 2.5 (out of 5)



And so concludes my Buffy season 6 retrospective/review. Tune in soon for season 7.

BUFFY: 6.21 ‘TWO TO GO’

UK episode promo

WRITER: Doug Petrie
DIRECTOR: Bill Norton

WHAT’S THE SITCH?

Dark Willow continues her violent warpath through Sunnydale, grabbing power where she can as she seeks out the two remaining members of the Trio – Andrew and Jonathan. Along the way there are more confrontations with Buffy in which the Slayer comes off worse. In a destructive showdown at the Magic Box it appears our black eyed girl has Buffy at her mercy...until the last minute intervention from an old friend.

WHAT’S THE SITCH BENEATH THE SITCH?

The unleashing of Dark Willow and her wrath continues. Themes touched on are the abuse of power, consequences of our actions and taking responsibility for those actions.

WHO’S GIVING US THE WIGGINS THIS WEEK?

Dark Willow

WHY IT ROCKS

Dark Willow: by far the best thing about these last three episodes of season 6 is Alyson Hannigan in full on evil Dark Willow mode. She is terrific and clearly having a load of fun especially when insulting and goading her friends. Her verbal and physical smack down with Buffy being a particular highlight.

Truck surfing. Willow standing atop a semi truck magically driving it to try and run the Scoobies off the road is a great image. Kinda Terminator-ish.

Slayer vs. Wicca: The Dark Willow v Buffy fight is pretty good, esp poor Anya hiding behind a counter trying to keep the protection spell around Andrew and Jonathan going.

Teleporting from Rack's: the sequence where Buffy confronts Willow at Rack's place thus saving Dawn from being turned back in to energy by Willow is great, especially as the two talk the camera slowly pans around them then pulls back to reveal Willow has teleported the three of them to the Magic Box.

The final moments of the episode feat. the return of an old friend.

WHY IT SUCKS

Dark Willow's rather obvious stunt double during the big Willow v Buffy fight scene.

The destruction of the police cell wall looks terrible. The set looks hugely fake – like blocks of precut Styrofoam.

IT’S BUFFTASTIC

“I'd like to test that theory.”

DIALOGUE TO DIE FOR

Jonathan: “Um, Anya, you're gonna have to break this down for us a little.”
Anya: “Warren shot Buffy. Warren shot Tara. Buffy's alive. Tara's dead. Willow found out, and being the most powerful Wicca in the western hemisphere, decided to get the payback. With interest.”
Andrew: “Wh-what about Warren?”
Anya: “She killed him. Ripped him apart and bloodied up the forest doing it. Now she's coming here and the two of you are next.”
Andrew: “Oh my god... Warren.”
Jonathan: “Oh my god... me.”

Willow: "Mom!" "Buffy!" "Tara!" "Waah!" It's time you go back to being a little energy ball. No more tears, Dawnie.

Willow: “So. Here we are.”
Buffy: “Are we really gonna do this?”
Willow: “Come on, this is a huge deal for me! Six years as a side man, and now I get to be the Slayer.”
Buffy: “A killer isn't a Slayer. Being a Slayer means something you can't conceive of.”
Willow: “Oh, Buffy. You really need to have every square inch of your ass kicked.”
Buffy: “Then show me what you got. And I'll show you what a Slayer really is.”

Willow: “Buffy... I gotta tell ya... I get it now. The Slayer thing really isn't about the violence. It's about the power. And there's no one in the world with the power to stop me now.”
A blast of magic energy knocks Willow over
Giles: “I'd like to test that theory.”

AND ANOTHER THING

Previously on Buffy: Being part 1 of the final episode of the season (it was shown as a double bill with Grave in the US) the opening recap is much longer than normal and has Xander announcing, "This is what happened this year..." as opposed to the usual Giles spoken, “Previously on Buffy the Vampire Slayer...”

Dinowillow: To herald the arrival of Dark Willow at the police station, the camera pans in to a cup of coffee which ripples in time with the thunder and lightening in a homage to Steven Spielberg's Jurassic Park.

HOW MANY STAKES?

Big G is back! 4 (out of 5)

BUFFY: 6.20 ‘VILLAINS’

A lovely tribute to Tara & Willow

WRITER: Marti Noxon
DIRECTOR: David Solomon

WHAT’S THE SITCH?

After Warren's shooting spree at Buffy's house Buffy is rushed to hospital seriously wounded while unbeknownst to the rest of the Scoobies Tara lies dead in Willow's bedroom. Willow, overcome by rage, and with dark magic in her system, takes off alone in search of more power which she intends to use to hunt down and kill Warren. Soon she has all the power she needs and Dark Willow is born. Warren (and the entire world) are in for it now.

WHAT’S THE SITCH BENEATH THE SITCH?

The almost banal hideousness and heartache of real and regular everyday evil.

WHO’S GIVING US THE WIGGINS THIS WEEK?

Warren. And Dark Willow.

WHY IT ROCKS

Hunting Warren: This episode is basically all about Willow, fuelled by rage and hate and the blackest of black magics, relentlessly hunting down a fleeing Warren as her friends try in vain to stop her from killing a human being and from being consumed for good by darkness. They have no chance though. And this story can only end one way. And so it does.

Dark Willow: If nothing else about this episode...nay...this entire season was any good then Dark Willow and Aly Hannigan's portrayal of her alone would make it all worth while. Our newly raven haired, black eyed, blood thirsty uber powerful goddess of revenge is a wondrous thing to behold. Aly Hannigan is clearly loving playing this version of Willow who is not afraid to tell her friends some home truths and to go toe to toe in a knock down drag out fight with her best friend Buffy. The look is great too – the black hair, black eyes, white face, veins showing... Brrr. Creepy. But also kinda...hot? Oh I'm such a bad man. Anyway, Dark Willow is up there with Vamp Willow as genius creations by Joss and Ally; two awesome aspects of an already awesome character.

Sucking out the magic: the sequence where Willow sucks out all the magic from the books in the Magic Box is brilliant! A terrific visual effect that shows all of the words and spells traveling over Willow's skin.

Warren the joke: Warren finally discovers the truth about himself and his sad little gang when he is gloating at a demon bar about how he 'killed' the slayer. He soon finds out from the gathered demons that Buffy is alive and will be out to get him. The demons have never heard of him or his gang and find him and his predicament hilarious. So hilarious they don't want to kill him as it will be far more fun to see what the slayer does to him when she finally catches up with him. Although unbeknownst to them all it isn't Buffy that Warren should be worrying about. It's Willow!

Clem: More Clem goodness as Buffy drops Dawn off at Spike's crypt only to find Clem now living there since Spike upped and left town. Buffy asks Clem to watch Dawn and the kindly demon happily agrees suggesting they rent The Wedding Planner and play Parcheesi.

Skinned alive: Warren's eventual death at Dark Willow's hands is fittingly nasty as, tied up Evil Dead style by creepers and vines, Warren is first tortured by Willow who, using magic, slowly pushes a bullet in to his chest. Then, with the immortal words “Bored now!” uses her magic to rip his entire skin from his flesh in one agonising go, before then burning him up in a fireball. And yes, this is just as gruesome as it sounds. So much so that it was so heavily edited when shown on the BBC that viewers were left wondering what exactly happened to Warren. Answer: nothing good.

Cliffhanger: the episode ends with Willow, having killed Warren, telling a shocked Buffy and Xander, “One down...” before vanishing in a cloud of black smoke and fire. The next episode is titled 'Two to Go'. Meaning Jonathan and Andrew are next.

WHY IT SUCKS

How did Warren know that he'd killed Tara? In fact, how did he kill Tara from that angle? Magic bullet time. Someone call Oliver Stone.

How did Spike get all the way from Sunnydale USA to Uganda in Africa in the timespan between Seeing Red and Villains seeing as how Villains follows on directly from Seeing Red? Has he developed teleporting powers??

IT’S BUFFTASTIC

“Bored now.”

DIALOGUE TO DIE FOR

Andrew: He's coming up with a plan. Like, "War Games." Remember that decoder that Matthew Broderick used?
Jonathan: Oh, yeah. That was rad. The one he made from the scissors and the tape recorder?
Andrew: I miss "Ferris" Matthew. Broadway Matthew? I find him cold.
Jonathan: Really? No, I- Shut up!

Buffy: We love you. And Tara. But we don't kill humans. It's not the way.
Willow: How can you say that? Tara is dead.
Buffy: I know... I know. And I... can't understand... anything. Not what happened... a-and not what you must be going through. Willow, if you do this, you let Warren destroy you too.
Xander: You said it yourself, Will... the magic's too strong, there's no coming back from it.
Willow: I'm not coming back.

Xander: I just... I've had blood on my hands all day. Blood from people I love.
Buffy: I know. And now it has to stop. Warren's going to get what he deserves. I promise . But I will not let Willow destroy herself.

Willow: Wanna know what a bullet feels like, Warren? A real one? It's not like in the comics.
Warren: No. No.
Willow: I think you need to. Feel it.
Warren: Oh god! Stop it!
Willow: It's not going to make a neat little hole. First, it'll obliterate your internal organs. Your lung will collapse. Feels like drowning.
Warren: Please! No.
Willow: When it finally hits your spine, it'll blow your central nervous system.
Warren: Oh please, stop, god! Please-
Willow: I'm talking! The pain will be unbearable, but you won't be able to move. Bullet usually travels faster than this, of course. But the dying? It'll seem like it takes forever. Something, isn't it? One tiny piece of metal destroys everything. It ripped her insides out... took her light away. From me. From the world. Now the one person who should be here is gone... and a waste like you gets to live. Tiny piece of metal. Can you feel it now?

Willow: Bored now.

AND ANOTHER THING

The song playing in the demon bar Warren visits is Die, Die My Darling by the Misfits.

When Buffy flatlines on the operating table after getting shot in the chest, this is the third time she has died on the show. Surely some record for a TV show's main character.

HOW MANY STAKES?

I'd be skinned alive if I didn't give it five. 5 (out of 5)

BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER 6.10 WRECKED

Trailer

WRITER: Marti Noxon

DIRECTOR: David Solomon

WHAT’S THE SITCH?

Returning home the next morning following their respective nights out, Buffy is ashamed of having slept with Spike and Willow is exhausted from having used so much magic. Later, still feeling drained from her over indulgence, Willow is taken by Amy to see a grubby sorcerer named Rack who deals in quick and powerful fixes of dark magic which quickly get Willow hooked. Later on that evening and Willow and Dawn head out together to go see a movie but Willow decides to make a stop at Rack's on the way to get another fix. This puts poor Dawn in to all sorts of unnecessary danger with the unforeseen consequences of Willow's latest dark magic fix being the summoning of a deadly demon who seems intent on killing the doped up witch and her teenage charge.

WHAT’S THE SITCH BENEATH THE SITCH?

Drug addiction and its consequences to both the individual and to those they love.

WHO’S GIVING US THE WIGGINS THIS WEEK?

Nasty dark magic dealer Rack, a scary demon, and also Willow and her magically addicted selfishness.

WHY IT ROCKS

Self satisfied Spike lying amidst the rubble and waving Buffy's discarded underwear at the disgusted-with-herself slayer.

Trippy, man! The sequences of Willow high (literally) on Rack's magic are nicely shot with some cool trippy FX.

Jeff Kober is suitably sleazy and creepy as Rack.

Willow enchanting one of Tara's dresses, filling it out with an invisible body to snuggle up to is touching and a wonderful visual effect.

Alyson Hannigan does doped up and self destructive pretty well.

Buffy's quiet talk with a distraught Willow and seeing herself in Willow's shoes thanks to her own 'addiction' to Spike is a great scene with SMG nailing every beat.

WHY IT SUCKS

The drug addiction metaphor is so in your face that it soon becomes kind of annoying. Don't do drugs kids, mmkay?

Neither Dawn nor Willow are wearing seat belts when the car they are in crashes in to the pillar at speed. No apparent airbags either. Dawnie would have gone through the wind sheild and Willow been crushed against the steering wheel. Both would almost certainly be goners. Yet both girls walk away with a few cuts, bruises and one slight fracture.

IT’S BUFFTASTIC

Magical Tara dress.

DIALOGUE TO DIE FOR

Xander: Anya has a theory. She thinks Martha Stewart froze that guy.
Anya: Don't be ridiculous. Martha Stewart isn't a demon. She's a witch.
Xander: Please, she... really?
Anya: Of course. Nobody could do that much decoupage without calling on the powers of darkness

Buffy: When...when did the building fall down?

Buffy: The only thing that's different is that I'm disgusted with myself. That's the power of your charms. Last night was the most perverse, degrading experience of my life.
Spike (grins): Yeah. Me, too.

Dawn: I'll leave a note for Buffy on the refrigerator. That's the first place she goes after patrolling. She's such a pig after she kills things.

Dawn: It was like a meat party in my mouth! Okay, now I'm just a kid and even I know that came out wrong.

AND ANOTHER THING

Actor Jeff Kober who plays Rack is probably best known in the UK for his series of Bacardi adverts, in which he was Ray from Reef Radio. He also played insane vampire Zackary Kralik in the season 2 Buffy episode Helpless.

The music playing when Willow is floating on Rack's ceiling is Laika's Black Cat Bone.

This episode is dedicated in memoriam to J.D. Peralta, who was Marti Noxon's assistant. She died of cancer on November 12, 2002, at the age of 31.

HOW MANY STAKES?

Amidst the wreckage we find 3 (out of 5)

BUFFY 5.21: THE WEIGHT OF THE WORLD

A short daily from this ep featuring SMG and Alyson Hannigan

WRITER: Doug Petrie

DIRECTOR: David Solomon

WHAT’S THE SITCH?

With Buffy catatonic Willow steps up and takes charge ordering the gang back to Sunnydale while she tries a spell to help Buffy. Spike says he knows a guy who may be able to help them defeat Glory and get Dawn back. Meanwhile Glory has Dawn back at her HQ where her minions have now almost finished building an enormous tower upon the top of which Dawn is to be used to open the portal which will allow Glory to return home. As Glory and her minions prepare Dawn for the coming ritual Glory is getting a taste of Ben’s humanity as the magic keeping them apart starts to fade. She begins to feel twinges of guilt…and hates it, making her even angrier towards poor Dawnie, and when Ben returns for brief periods he in turn begins to remember all of the terrible things Glory has done. Across town, Spike and Xander go to visit Doc, the demon who helped Dawn with the spell to raise her mom from the dead. It turns out Doc is actually a worshipper of Glory and tries to kill Spike but ends up getting stabbed himself as Spike makes off with a box Doc tried to destroy. But Doc isn't dead and opens his eyes just as Spike and Xander leave. Back to Buffy, and Willow has managed to get inside her friend’s head, following the Slayer around in her own mind as she is locked in a cycle of guilt. The cycle begins with a memory of Buffy as a little girl, witnessing baby Dawn being brought home for the first time. It then moves on to The Magic Box where adult Buffy, putting away a book, has a brief moment of wishing it would all be over. Finally, the cycle ends with Buffy smothering a grown up Dawn with a pillow, telling a horrified Willow that this is who she is, that she killed her sister and that death is her gift. The cycle then starts all over again, repeating over and over, much to Willow’s confusion. Eventually Willow figures out what is going on and manages to get through to Buffy, convincing her that Dawn is still alive and needs her help. Buffy snaps out of her catatonic state and, crying, hugs Willow. As they return to the magic shop, Xander tells Buffy that Ben and Glory are one in the same. Giles then reveals that a bloodletting ceremony will occur to open the portal and that said portal opening will bring down the barriers between all dimensions creating utter carnage and torment for humanity. And there is only one way to stop it once started. Dawn must die.

WHAT’S THE SITCH BENEATH THE SITCH?

It’s all about the destructive power of guilt – especially misplaced guilt.

WHO’S GIVING US THE WIGGINS THIS WEEK?

Glory, Doc, Buffy…kinda.

WHY IT ROCKS

A nice idea. Finally, the horrendous life Buffy is forced to lead catches up with her poor damaged psyche. I mean, how many traumas can one person take? Losing Dawn to Glory after she promised never to let any harm come to her was the final straw for our poor Slayer’s mind. Time for it to take a break then. And having Willow go in to Buffy’s mind and discover the root of her problem and then address it head on is also great. Her final solution may be a bit pat and wouldn’t make her popular with practitioners of mental health care (“Snap out of it!”), but for Buff it works. Thankfully.

Great to see Kristine Sutherland back as Joyce in a memory of Buffy’s.

Great to see Joel Grey back as Doc. He does creepy/slimy really well.

The actress playing little Buffy (aged 5 or 6 maybe?) is adorable and very good, though she doesn’t look much like SMG.

WHY IT SUCKS

Apart from the trip around the inside of Buffy’s noggin nothing much happens. Dawn gets to be ranted at by Glory some and the gang finds out about the bloodletting ritual, but that’s about it.

IT’S BUFFTASTIC

Frustrated Spike slapping the back of Xander’s head when Xander still can’t remember the truth about Ben and Glory, followed by their mutual yelp of pain – Xander’s due to the slap and Spike’s due to his chip firing.

DIALOGUE TO DIE FOR

Spike: "Better part of a century spent in delinquency just paid off. Hot-wired Ben's auto. Who's for getting the hell out of here?"

Spike: "Is everyone here very stoned?"

Glory: "Funny, 'cause I look around at this world you're so eager to be a part of, and all I see's six billion lunatics looking for the fastest ride out. Who's not crazy? Look around... everyone's drinkin', smokin', shootin' up, shootin' each other or just plain screwing their brains out because they don't want 'em anymore. I'm crazy? Honey, I am the original one-eyed chicklet in the kingdom of the blind 'cause at least I admit the world makes me nuts. Name one person who can take it here. That's all I'm asking. Name one."
Dawn: "Buffy."

Young Buffy: "You talk funny."
Willow: "Yes, as you'll tell me again when we're older, and in chem class."

AND ANOTHER THING

In season 2's 'Killed By Death' the young Buffy had dark hair as did the Buffy in Dawn's memory in 'Blood Ties', but here the little girl playing Buffy has blonde hair.

The actress playing little Buffy is called Alexandra Lee and a year after being young Buffy she had the honour of being Katie, Dr Mark Greene’s last ever patient on E.R.

HOW MANY STAKES?

A reasonably weighty 3 (out of 5)

BUFFY 5.20: SPIRAL

Trailer

WRITER: Steven S. DeKnight

DIRECTOR: James A. Contner

WHAT’S THE SITCH?

Buffy grabs Dawn and makes a run for it from Glory, who gives immediate chase. After a brief battle Glory gets knocked down by a truck which allows the sisters time to escape. Regrouping with the rest of the gang, Buffy decides they all need to run away, that they can’t win this fight and must flee to somewhere safe. Spike steals them a big motor home and the gang heads out of town, out in to the desert in a vain attempt to get away from Glory. Unfortunately the Knights of Byzantium give chase on horseback and a running battle ensues along the desert highway with Buffy atop the speeding vehicle fending off the continuous attacks from the warriors on horseback. Soon though, a well-aimed spear takes out Giles in the driver’s seat and the camper turns over and crashes. The gang manages to flee the ruined van to a deserted gas station where they engage in a brief battle with the pursuing Knights, capturing the Knights’ leader in the process. Using magic Willow creates a protective barrier around the gas station as the gang prepares for a prolonged siege against the nasty Knights outside. But Giles is badly hurt and needs medical attention. So using rules of warfare Buffy negotiates a truce to allow for medical help to arrive…in the form of nurse Ben, who treats Giles and saves his life. Unfortunately Glory soon decides to make an appearance and Ben turns in to the hell god right in front of the gathered Scoobies, though only Spike amongst them can seem to remember after the fact that Ben is Glory and vice versa. After a short fight, Glory grabs Dawn and makes off, killing all the gathered knights as she leaves. A panicked Buffy rushes after her…only to find that Glory and little sis have vanished in to the night. Utterly traumatised by her failure to protect Dawn, Buffy lapses in to a catatonic state from which her friends seem unable to rouse her.

WHAT’S THE SITCH BENEATH THE SITCH?

The pressure is on and everyone looks to you to make the big decisions, to tell them what to do in the face of seemingly insurmountable odds. Do you rise to the occasion or do you crack under the strain?

WHO’S GIVING US THE WIGGINS THIS WEEK?

Glory and those pesky Knights of Byzantium

WHY IT ROCKS

Rollercoaster. Spiral is a non-stop rollercoaster of an episode. It is jam packed with action and desperate decisions and desperate measures. Buffy is pushed to the edge and beyond as she has seemingly no way out of the situation she finds herself in. Fight or flight kicks in. And as fight seems impossible then flight it is. And the Slayer goes on the run.

Road Warrior. Buffy goes all Mad Max as she engages in a running battle along a desert highway against pursing warriors out for blood. It’s a big and exciting sequence with athletic fights atop (and inside) the speeding motor home as the gang fends off seemingly endless arrow, sword and spear attacks.

Buffy goes bye bye. Poor Buffy, everyone is turning to her, wanting more and more from her, and she doesn’t know what to do, except to run. She has one role in life now: protect her sister. And she fails to do that. The shock of her failure drops our girl in to a catatonic state, a glassy eyed zombie who has retreated deep in to herself, away from the big bad world. It is worth noting that Buffy’s mental health has always been a lurking issue in this series. She confesses to time spent in an institution, and reality to her always seems a fragile concept. This comes to a head in the underrated season six episode ‘Normal Again’.

WHY IT SUCKS

I’ve fallen. Oh dear, at the start when Buffy and Dawn are running away from Glory, Dawn very quickly falls over and squeals in pain, forcing Buffy to pick her up and carry her as she runs on. A terrible cliché that makes Dawn seem pretty darn pathetic.

The Knights Who Say "Ni!” The Knights of Byzantium are still a daft concept, at least visually. They just look like Monty Python extras from The Holy Grail. How on earth would dozens of medieval garbed men on horseback brandishing deadly weapons be able to make their way around contemporary California without getting arrested and/or sectioned? And that must be one quiet highway for no one driving by to have noticed a big medieval battle and siege going on and to report it to the police.

IT’S BUFFTASTIC

Back flips and kicking ass atop a speeding motor home. Cool!

DIALOGUE TO DIE FOR

Glory: "Last words, Slay-runt?"
Buffy: "Just one-- Truck."

Anya: "Anybody else feel that?"
Willow: "What?"
Anya: "Cold draft of paralyzing fear?"

Anya: "We should drop a piano on her. Well, it always works for that creepy cartoon rabbit when he's running from that nice man with the speech impediment."

Anya: "Oooh, snacks! The secret to any successful migration. (pulls frying pan and Spam from her bag) Who's up for some tasty fried meat products?"

Dawn: "You're not fleeing, you're...moving at a brisk pace."
Buffy: "Quaintly referred to in some cultures as 'The Big Scairdy Run-Away'."

Tara: (looking out motor home window) “Horsies!"
Willow: "Tara!"
Giles: "Weapons?"
Spike: "Hello! You're driving one!"
Willow: "Don't hit the horsies!"
Buffy: (to Willow) "We won't!" (whispers to Giles) "Aim for the horsies."

Dawn: (bandaging Spike’s hands) "Keep the pressure on."
Spike: "Always do, Sweet Pea."

AND ANOTHER THING

What with the Holy Grail-esque knights and Anya's offer to cook Spam there seems to be a whole Monty Python thing going on here.

Steve DeKnight’s original script was much bigger scale with more epic fights, especially in the opening escape from Glory. But Joss read it and ordered him to cut it right back as it would take weeks to film and cost millions more. Steve drew the line at the Winnebago chase though. That HAD to stay in.

HOW MANY STAKES?

It’s all too much for the Buffster 4 (out of 5)

BUFFY 5.19: TOUGH LOVE

Willow vs. Glory

WRITER: Rebecca Rand Kirshner

DIRECTOR: David Grossman

WHAT’S THE SITCH?

Buffy withdraws from college to take care of Dawn, who it seems has been regularly skipping school. Buffy is warned by Dawn’s school that unless things change she might be found unfit to be Dawn's legal guardian and have Dawn taken away from her. After unsuccessfully trying to convince Giles to be the stern authority figure Buffy resolves to take on the role much to Dawn’s disdain. Elsewhere and Willow and Tara have their first fight with Willow ending up storming out. Glory finds Tara sad and alone, siting on a bench at the college fair. At first Glory thinks Tara is the Key but after tasting her blood realises she isn’t. So instead Glory drains Tara’s mind, turning the poor girl in to yet another of the crazy people in Sunnydale. Meanwhile Giles, Anya and Willow capture one of Glory's minions, who reveals to them that Glory thinks Tara is the Key. Willow rushes off to save her girlfriend, but she arrives too late. Overcome with fury, Willow goes after Glory seeking revenge for what she did to poor Tara. Using some dark magic Willow manages to briefly hurt the hell god but Glory soon gets the better of the witch and Willow would be toast if it weren’t for the Buffster turning up at the last moment to save her. A short time later and Willow, Tara, Buffy and Dawn are gathered in the witches’ dorm room discussing what to do next. Suddenly a furious Glory appears by ripping out the entire outside wall. At that precise moment Tara, still out of her mind, looks at Dawn and says she sees her as pure green energy. Glory smiles coldly as she finally realises the true identity of the Key.

WHAT’S THE SITCH BENEATH THE SITCH?

I guess its primarily about taking on new roles and stepping up and taking responsibility. Buffy is still firmly in big sister mode and is not yet filling the parenting void left by Joyce’s demise. As a kid still, Dawn needs firm rules, boundaries and guidance. Buffy can’t yet see herself in this role and so tries to convince Giles to do it. But Giles says no, realising that Buffy will have to step up as it’s the only way forward for the Summers family. Buffy gives in but attacks the problem as if she is a general ordering around a soldier and not a caring mother figure, much to Dawn’s (and Willow’s) dismay.

WHO’S GIVING US THE WIGGINS THIS WEEK?

Glory

WHY IT ROCKS

Tara and Willow – their relationship comes in to focus here and is put to its first relationship type test when they have their first big fight. As if there were any doubt the depth of their love becomes clear when Willow does what she does when Tara is hurt. The bit at the end with Willow feeding Tara and telling Buffy that no matter what, Tara is her girl is genuinely touching.

Buffy and Dawn – the crux of this season is Buffy taking on a more personal role of responsibility, of making her responsible for someone she cares about, giving her a new role in life, adding to her growth as a person and as a character. She takes a big if faltering step forward in that role here.

Glory – as always Clare Kramer is so much fun as the so very cute but evil and insane hell god. Her bubble bath with a loofer, a Mimosa cocktail and three blindfolded minions is highly entertaining.

The Glory vs. Willow fight – it’s a great little smackdown with the witch hurling all sorts of magic at the hell god with almost no success, though she does seem to slow her down a bit, allowing Buffy to arrive and buy them some time for an escape.

Ripper – Giles gets to go all ruthless hard man as he threatens and interrogates the captured minion. Thing is, we buy it. Giles can be genuinely scary and ruthless, as he will prove come the end of the season.

Kicking a couch – in the fight with Glory Buffy kicks a large couch at her, knocking her back. I just love that image for some reason. It’s weird but powerful. You just don’t see enough couch kicking in on-screen fights.

References - Not many genre shows get to include overt references to superheroes (X-Men), classic children’s literature (A Little Princess) and opera (Don Giovanni) in a single episode. One of the many things Buffy was great at was treating its audience as intelligent people who may love superheroes and general geekiness but may also equally love classic literature and the arts too. Basically all the same stuff Joss loves.

The cliffhanger ending – wow, what a great way to end an episode! Glory rips out an entire exterior wall only to discover poor Dawnie is her Key and is right there in front of her. Gulp.

WHY IT SUCKS

Willow seems to have become a very powerful witch without us really noticing. I guess she has done lots more practice off screen. But to go toe to toe with a god and actually score some points is impressive.

IT’S BUFFTASTIC

Bath time for Glory

DIALOGUE TO DIE FOR

Glory: ‘Lotta sucky things in this dimension. Bubble baths? Not one of 'em.’

Xander (to Buffy): ‘Whatever you choose, you've got my support. Just think of me as... as your... You know, I'm searching for supportive things and I'm coming up all bras. So, something slightly more manly, think of me as that.’

Buffy: ‘It's really important that Dawn finishes her schoolwork right now.’
Willow: ‘I know it is, and I'm a big fan of school! You know me, I'm like (singing and doing a little dance), "Go school, it's your birthday"... or something to that effect.’

Willow (miserable): ‘I don't think I can sleep without her.’
Anya (helpfully): ‘You can sleep with me! (The group stares at her.) Well, now, that came out a lot more lesbian than it sounded in my head.’

AND ANOTHER THING

In the Magic Box Xander is reading issue #109 of The X-Men titled "Ceremonies," written by Chris Claremont and pencilled by Thomas Derenick.

This episode is the first time Willow’s eyes go black.

HOW MANY STAKES?

We love it tough. 3.5 (out of 5)

BUFFY 4.19: ‘NEW MOON RISING’

Willow and Oz’s very first date. Cute. (Ally and Seth circa 1988)

WRITER: Marti Noxon

DIRECTOR: James A. Contner

WHAT’S THE SITCH?

Just as Willow and Tara are enjoying the flowering of their new romantic relationship, who should suddenly turn up out of the blue but Oz. Yep, good ol’ Oz. The taciturn wolfman is back. He’s been travelling the world searching for a cure for his werewolfism. And he appears to have found it. His reappearance throws poor Willow and obviously crushes an already insecure Tara. Oz, not knowing about Willow and Tara, is looking to get his girl back now that he’s discovered a way to control his beast, to keep it inside. However he soon cottons on to Willow’s new relationship. And an explosion of jealousy releases his savage inner beast. Transforming in to a wolf, Oz chases Tara only to be quickly captured and subdued by Riley and a squad of Initiative soldiers who think he’s the demon who killed one of their men earlier on (he isn’t). Before Tara can tell Riley’s its Oz, the unconscious wolf is carted away. Tara rushes to find Buffy and Willow to tell them what happened. A plan is quickly formed to sneak in to the Initiative and rescue Oz, which the gang manages to do, forcing Riley to finally choose a side.

WHAT’S THE SITCH BENEATH THE SITCH?

Oz is back and dealing with his inner beast. So we are back to that beast within metaphor. There is also a potentially abusive relationship angle here as we now realise that anger, jealousy – especially to do with Willow - lets loose Oz’s beast. They have a conversation where Oz says if she ever makes him angry then he could go all animal and hurt her. At least Oz realises the issue and makes responsible decisions. There’s also a theme of bigotry and sexuality. Willow basically comes out to Buffy, telling her about Tara. Initially Buffy is rather shocked and kinda thrown. But she soon recovers and gives her friend the support she needs. Later, when discussing with Riley about Oz being a werewolf, and seeing shocked Riley’s reaction to Willow having been involved with such a creature, Buffy gets angry at Riley’s apparent bigotry. She rightly says that love isn’t always clean and simple. You love who you love. Though I suspect Buffy is angrier at her own initial reaction to Willow confiding in her as well as also reflecting on her own past relationship with Angel.

WHO’S GIVING US THE WIGGINS THIS WEEK?

Oz I guess, with the Initiative guys having a good try.

WHY IT ROCKS

The script. Marti Noxon wrote an emotional rollercoaster. Poor Willow. Poor Tara. Poor Oz. People are gonna get hurt. And hurt they do indeed get.

The themes. As discussed in the ‘What’s the sitch beneath the sitch?’ section, the themes are strong and pretty effective without ever beating the audience over the head.

Oz. Yay! Seth Green returns for his penultimate ever appearance on Buffy to tie up the loose ends left hanging after his rather hasty departure earlier in the season. And as always he’s great. It’s good to see a slightly new side to the character – a pent up aggression which is totally against type.

Willow. Alyson Hannigan is truly excellent. Poor Willow is put through the emotional wringer, not knowing what to do, not wanting to hurt anyone. Her last scene with Oz in his van is wonderful as is her sad little speech to him, perfectly written by Marti Noxon. Her final scene with Tara is equally good and oh so sweet.

Tara. Amber Benson does strong work. You can see her heart starting to break when Oz turns up. She has to make you believe that Willow would want to be with her. And she does. Tara is sweet, gentle and willing to put everyone else’s needs before her own.

WHY IT SUCKS

As always, werewolf Oz looks rubbish. Hairy monkey time again.

I’m not quite sure why the Initiative guys would believe that Buffy would really kill their general when she’s holding him hostage. Everything they know of her would tell them she’s bluffing. Hey ho.

Oz has been gone for about five and a half months. He seems to have travelled an awful long way and seen a lot of remote parts of the world in that time. Not impossible, just a bit improbable.

IT’S BUFFTASTIC

Willow and Oz’s final goodbye

DIALOGUE TO DIE FOR

Riley: “OK, I'm up less than a minute and somehow I've managed to piss you off.”

Buffy: “You mean Tara has a crush on Oz? No, you — oh. Oh. Um... Well... That's great. You know, I mean, I think Tara is a really great girl, Will.”
Willow: “She is. And... there's something between us. It wasn't something I was looking for. It's just powerful. And it's totally different from what Oz and I have.”
Buffy: “Well, there you go. I mean, you know, you have to follow your heart, Will. And that's what important, Will.”
Willow: “Why do you keep saying my name like that?”
Buffy: “Like what, Will?”
Willow: “Are you freaked?”
Buffy: “What? No, Will, don't — (regains her composure) No. No, absolutely no to that question. I'm glad you told me.”

Adam: “Scout's honour.”
Spike: “You were a Boy Scout?”
Adam: “Parts of me.”

Oz: “It was stupid to think that you'd just be... waiting.”
Willow: “I was waiting. I feel like some part of me will always be waiting for you. Like if I'm old and blue-haired and I turn the corner in Istanbul, and there you are. I won't be surprised... Because you're with me, you know?”

AND ANOTHER THING

In the original script Emma Caulfield was listed with the regulars for the first time, though she wasn’t yet added to the opening credits.

HOW MANY STAKES?

Return of the Wolfman. 4 (out of 5)

BUFFY: 4.06 ‘WILD AT HEART’

A video about this episode featuring ‘Need to Destroy’ by THC as heard in the episode.

WRITER: Marti Noxon
DIRECTOR: David Grossman

WHAT’S THE SITCH?

It’s full moon time again and Oz is getting ready to get hairy. But his growing friendship and obvious attraction to sultry singer Veruca is worrying Willow, though she won’t say anything as she doesn’t want to come across all jealous. On the first night of the full moon (remember in Buffy that werewolves change the night before, the night of, and the night after the full moon) Oz gets loose from his cage and meets up with another werewolf, scaring Professor Walsh in the process. The two werewolves fight. Fade to black. The next day Oz wakes up in the woods naked…entwined with a naked Veruca. It is obvious the pair got it on while in wolf form. Veruca is a free spirit and won’t be caged when she turns. She tries to entice Oz to give up locking himself away at full moons and to be with her from now on. Their mutual animal attraction is undeniable but Oz resists. That night, concerned that Veruca might hurt someone, Oz tricks her in to his lockable cage. The next morning Willow turns up to free him but she is heartbroken to find a naked Oz and naked Veruca entwined yet again. Oz tries to explain but Willow is inconsolable. The next night, Veruca, determined to get Oz for herself, decides to eliminate the one thing standing in her way: Willow.

WHAT’S THE SITCH BENEATH THE SITCH?

The heartbreak around relationships that for what ever reason are just not working anymore. Plus the old resisting the beast inside, and how pure animal lust based upon nothing more can be destructive.

WHO’S GIVING US THE WIGGINS THIS WEEK?

Veruca

WHY IT ROCKS

The script. Marti Noxon wrote a smart, funny, tragic, heartbreaking script that in one episode utterly destroys a brilliant relationship which had been at the very heart of this show for the previous two years.

Oz and Willow. We watched as Oz became utterly entranced upon his first seeing Willow back in early season 2, a then rather awkward, geeky young girl. And we watched Willow become deeply attached to this kind, whip smart, stoically funny base player who just happens to be a werewolf. Their chemistry together has been second to none, making them a pure joy to watch on screen. But in the space of 44 minutes it all gets torn asunder.

Alyson Hannigan. We already know she’s an excellent actress and in this episode she gets to bring the pain in a big way: the floods of tears, the look of utter devastation that haunts her face and her entire demeanour. As Joss once said, and I paraphrase, if you want to get the audience on side then just put Willow in danger or make her cry. Instant emotional gut wrench. And he’s right. Ally making the big wet eyes just stabs your heart.

Seth Green. We love Seth Green. He’s Scott Evil. He’s Chris Griffin. He’s co-creator of the ace Robot Chicken. He’s been in loads of movies. But to some of us he will always be Daniel ‘Oz’ Osbourne – the first big love of Willow’s life. Here, Seth gives a typically low-key Oz style performance, though you can feel the confusion, the anger, the pain and the anguish radiating from him throughout. His last scene with Willow is brilliant and would make the stoniest of hearts crack just a little. We will miss you Oz. You were THE (wolf) man! *Sniff*

Spike’s hilarious cameo. At the start of the episode the platinum vamp is watching from a safe distance as Buffy bests a vamp. He then starts to give an angry and dramatic monologue directed at the Slayer only to be suddenly and unceremoniously stunned unconscious by one of the mysterious army guys seen prowling around all season. And that’s the last we see of him all episode.

WHY IT SUCKS

Though a very good episode it feels like a rather rushed exit for such a beloved character. But there were unavoidable reasons for this. See ‘AND ANOTHER THING’ further down for more.

Veruca. The sexy, sultry, dangerous bad girl act doesn’t really come off. She comes across more as a rather annoying wannabe. You want sexy bad girl? Faith. ‘nuff said. Paige Moss who plays Veruca is okay but using my own inner animal I detected no real depth or edge to her performance. Nothing to make my inner beast perk up. Guess it’s just a werewolf thing.

The werewolves. Since the show redesigned the wolves after their first appearance in 2.15 ‘Phases’ they have looked like utter shit. I hate them. They look like people in silly furry costumes prancing around like idiots. There is nothing remotely wolf-like about them. Professor Walsh even says in this episode that at first she thought they were gorillas. That’s an insult to gorillas. And what's with Oz’s ridiculous werewolf mutton chops in his mid-transformation phase? Jeez!

Lip synching. Paige Moss’s lip synching to the songs Veruca sings is terrible. It doesn’t match at all. Plus her ‘sultry’ and ‘seductive’ stage performance is so overdone it is pretty darn funny.

IT’S BUFFTASTIC

A tie between Spike’s hilarious cameo at the start and the last scene between Willow and Oz. It gets you right here (points at chest).

DIALOGUE TO DIE FOR

Buffy (to random vamp she's fighting): "You know very well, you eat this late... (Stakes him.)... you're gonna get heartburn. Get it? Heartburn? (He turns to dust.) That's it? That's all I get? One lame-ass vamp with no appreciation for my painstakingly thought out puns. I don't think the forces of darkness are even trying."

Willow: "I have wrong feelings about other guys sometimes. But I feel guilty and I flog and punish."
Buffy: "Exactly. I'm sure Oz is flogging and punishing himself... this is sounding wrong before I even finish."

Spike (to Buffy, out of earshot): “Watch your mouth, little girl. You should know better than to tempt the Fates that way. 'Cause the Big Bad is back, and this time it's... VARGHHHHHH!” (As he's being shocked with a taser.)

Giles: “Don't look at me that way. I'm down with the new music.”

Willow (To Xander): “I need a translator from the 'Y' side of things.”

Oz: “Look, Buffy, you should know that, that —“
Buffy: “Oz, now might be a good time for your trademark stoicism.”

Willow: “Oz, don't you love me?”
Oz: “My whole life I've never loved anything else.”

AND ANOTHER THING

THC is the real band playing the music of Shy, Veruca’s band.

Seth Green’s departure from Buffy was a rather short notice affair. He’d had a big hit that summer with Austin Powers 2 and was looking to further his film career. Luckily Oz wasn’t killed off and would reappear in one episode of season 5 to draw a final line under the Willow/Oz story.

HOW MANY STAKES?

Bye, bye Oz. 3.5 (out of 5)

Buffy: 3.16 ‘Doppelgangland’

Writer: Joss Whedon
Director: Joss Whedon

What's the sitch?

Anya, the ex-vengeance demon last seen in 3.9 ‘The Wish’, embarks on a mission to get her mystical necklace back so as to restore her power. She tricks Willow in to helping her with a spell to reclaim the necklace from a point in time before it was destroyed. Willow, feeling put upon and taken for granted by everyone including loathsome Principle Snyder, Giles and her friends, agrees to help Anya, being eager to experiment more with the black arts. But the spell goes wrong and WiIlow takes off leaving behind an angry and despondent Anya. However, unbeknown to them both the spell did actually work…kinda. Only instead of Anya’s necklace, it brought in to our world the deliciously slinky and evil Vampire Willow from the alternative reality last seen in ‘The Wish’. Buffy and Xander run in to the newly arrived Vampire Willow at the Bronze thinking she is their Willow but soon discovering to their horror that she is actually a vampire. Assuming their Wilow is dead, the two shocked friends head back to the library to tell Giles the awful news. Meanwhile, confused and upset by this new world full of many happy humans and not so many evil vamps, Vampire Willow decides to recruit a vampire army from those she can find, who are all currently working for The Mayor, in order to start taking back the night for vampire kind, beginning with attacking the human crowded Bronze. A potential mass slaughter awaits unless Buffy and co. can work out what's happened and ccme up with a plan to save the day.

What's the sitch beneath the sitch?

Don’t be a pushover. Get in touch with your inner badass and stand up for yourself. In this utterly brilliant episode good old reliable Willow, that so very smart, eager and kind teenager, is finally and justifiably feeling put upon and taken for granted by her friends and pretty much everyone else around her. People constantly expect and demand stuff from her be it knowledge, expertise, remembering things they’ve been too lazy to remember or to do themselves. And the girl has had enough. Bringing back the wonderful Vampire Willow doppelganger from ‘The Wish’ lets us and the world see a whole other side to the very sweet Ms Rosenberg – a tough, sexy, confident and devilishly playful side that won’t take crap from anyone be they obnoxious high school jocks or unthinking best friends. Willow sees in her evil doppelganger things to fear and to loathe, but she also more importantly sees things to admire and to emulate in her own life. Just not the killing and the S&M wear.

Who's giving us the wiggins this week?

Vampire Willow, Anya and assorted vampire goons.

Why it rocks

Joss at his best. Doppelgangland is utter perfection on every single level – character, drama, theme, acting and bringing the major league funny. If you wanted a Buffy novice to know why Joss’s little myth garnered such love and widespread acclaim (despite the goofy title and premise) then you’d simply show them ‘Doppelgangland’ along with a few other choice episodes – probably ‘The Body’, ‘Hush’, ‘Once More With Feeling’ and ‘Becoming 1&2’. The script here is so well written by Joss who always starts with character and theme and then builds his story up from there. And what a story it is. Through Vampire Willow we see the Willow we know and love in a whole new light. Especially when Buffy tells her to remember that a vampire’s personality has nothing to do with the human they were before and Angel almost contradicts her for he knows that simply isn’t true.

Alyson Hannigan. The entire cast is wonderful but Ally Hannigan is the shining star here. Playing the dual roles of sweet, meek, put-upon Willow and sleek, sexy, deadly Vampire Willow, the girl just stuns.

Vampire Willow. An instant smash with the fans when she first appeared in ‘The Wish’, Joss obviously loved her too because here she is in all of her slinky, sexy, evil, and kinda gay glory. Vamp Willow is scary and sexy but she is also drop dead funny. Her deadpan reaction to seeing ‘our’ Willow is priceless: “Look at me. I’m all fuzzy.” As is her exasperation while locked in the book cage, trying to convince an unsuspecting Cordelia to let her out. “What?” asks vain Cordy, frowning at Vampire Willow who’s staring at her hungrily. “Do I have something on my neck?” “Not yet,” is the dryly-muttered answer.

The entire old reliable vs. Old Faithful vs. Old Yeller exchange and Willow’s subsequent attempt to storm off.

Thinking his cross is not working properly after aiming it mistakenly at our Willow, Xander shakes it as you might a faulty flashlight. LOL

Giles’ reaction when he sees that our Willow is not in fact dead.

Angel’s confusion at seeing our Willow alive. “Hey Willow. Wait a sec…”

Wesley’s girly scream when Cordy surprises him.

Willow, surprised, noticing her own cleavage while wearing Vampire Willow’s low cut getup. “Gosh, look at those.”

Cordy lecturing a caged Vampire Willow on the ethics of boyfriend stealing thinking she's talking to our Willow.

Willow impersonating Vamp Willow at the Bronze.

Willow’s signal (a scream)

Buffy’s end fight at the Bronze and her cool use of a pool cue as a weapon.

Vampire Willow’s reaction as she arrives back in her world and is promptly staked.

Why it sucks

Nothing. Zero. Nada. No suckage here.

It's Buftastic

The entire scene of our Willow impersonating Vampire Willow at the Bronze – especially the little hidden wave she gives Oz to let him know its her. Wonderful.

Dialogue to die for

Oh God, I could quote the entire script but I’ll try and keep it down to a few choice cuts. Here goes...

Willow: "Buff. I'm storming off. It doesn't really work if you come with me."

Willow (confused after Buffy, Xander and Giles crush her in a big hug): "It's really nice that you guys missed me. Say! You all didn't happen to do a bunch of drugs, did ya?"

Vampire Willow (meeting the real Willow): "Well, look at me. I'm all fuzzy."

Willow: "That's me as a vampire? I'm so evil. And skanky. And I think I'm kinda gay!"

Willow (looking down at her cleavage): "Gosh, look at those!"

Willow: “No, it's fine. I'm 'Old Reliable'.”
Xander: “She just means, you know, the geyser. You're like a geyser of fun that goes off at regular intervals.”
Willow: “That's Old Faithful.”
Xander: “Isn't that the dog that, that the guy had to shoot...”
Willow: (angrily now) “That's Old Yeller.”
Buffy: “Xander, I beg you not to help me.”

Xander: “Uh... Will, this is verging on naughty touching here. Don't wanna fall back on bad habits. HANDS! Hands in new places!”

Buffy (to Xander): “Aren't you gonna introduce me to your...Holy *God*, you're Willow.”

Angel(rushes in): “Buffy, I…something's happened. Willow's dead.”
He glances over and sees Willow. She waves at him.
Angel(casualy): “Hey, Willow."
He does a double take.
Angel: "Wait a second…”
Xander: “We're right there with you, buddy.”

Willow: “This girl has a history of mental problems dating back to early childhood. (desperately) I'm a blood-sucking fiend! Look at my outfit!”
Vampire: “A human. I should have smelled it right away.”
Willow: “A human? Oh, yeah? Could a human do this?”
She screams at the top of her lungs.
Anya: “Sure. Yeah. Humans do that. Yeah. (shrugs)”
Vampire: (concurring) “Yeah. Yeah, I think, yeah.”


And another thing

In the Bronze when Willow is pretending to be Vampire Willow, she runs her hand through a girl's hair. Some fans thought that girl was Amber Benson (who played Tara in later seasons). Nope, it's not her.

How many stakes?

Double trouble means twice the greatness. 5+ (out of 5)

Buffy: 2.15 ‘Phases’

Writer: Rob Des Hotel, Dean Batali
Director: Bruce Seth Green

What's the sitch?

It’s the full moon. And in horror land you know what that means, right? Okay, so it’s actually the night before the full moon but this is properly explained in the episode. Anyway, a big, hairy, growly beast is stalking the sexual hot spots of Sunnydale – the lovers’ lane make out spot mainly, with Xander and Cordy almost becoming its victims. Yup, it’s a werewolf. Giles is excited by the news of tracking such a beast but tells Buffy and the gang that said werewolf is most likely a wholly innocent human who's totally unaware that three nights of the month they turn furry and hungry. You see, in the Buffyverse, a werewolf will transform the night before, the night of, and the night after the full moon. So on the next night, full moon night, Buffy and Giles go out hunting to “Bring ‘em back alive,” as Buffy jokes. But all too soon they run across Cain, a nasty werewolf hunter who’s out for werewolf pelts to sell for a pretty penny on the black market. And so the race is on for Buffy to capture wolfie before it hurts anyone and also before Cain can bag himself another beast. Meanwhile Xander has been investigating, seeing if he can discover who the werewolf is, with his sights being set squarely on Larry the obnoxious bully. But there’s a big shock for the gang when the true identity of the werewolf is eventually discovered.

What's the sitch beneath the sitch?

The major theme here is teenage male hormones and sexual identity. The metaphor in this episode is more or less in line with most modern werewolf stories – the struggle against the beast within. But the writers have also added the major sexual element to play up the hormonal male teenager as rampaging beast idea. The werewolf is attracted to places of gathered sexual heat, so it stalks the lovers’ lane area and also ends up at The Bronze where youngsters are busy dancing and making out. About half way through the episode we find out who the werewolf is after some misdirection including an amusing incident and admission from bully Larry to Xander. The identity of the werewolf is…Oz. He was bitten on the finger by his little cousin, Jordy. After a phone call to his aunt and uncle, Oz discovers Jordy is indeed a werewolf. The rest of the episode centres on Willow being frustrated over the lack of “smoochies” and intimacy with Oz now that they are dating. This leads her to confront him on it at exactly the wrong time…when he is about to chain himself up pre-transformation on the third night. She wanted the more sexually aggressive Oz, well, she’s about to get it.

Who's giving us the wiggins this week?

The werewolf. Cain, the werewolf hunter. And a cool cameo for Angelus.

Why it rocks

Yay! At last we get to see a lycanthrope on Buffy. And the writers, as often with this show, find a fun new spin on an old legend by adding in the whole hunting by/for sexual heat thing. Also the three night transformation before, on, and after the full moon is great and works well. If only other werewolf films had thought to include a simple new rule like that. As much as I love An American Werewolf in London, it has always bugged me that David transforms two nights following when it is stated he transforms only on the full moon. There is only ever one full moon per month. Fact. All it needed was a line of dialogue to slightly modify the legend as is done here.

This is an Oz and Willow centric episode…mostly Oz. And what’s not to love about that? Seth Green and Ally Hannigan make for an adorable onscreen couple.

Seth Green as Oz is simply a brilliant character.

The hilariously mundane phone call to Oz’s Aunt where he casually asks her if his cousin is a werewolf?

Cain is suitably creepy and obnoxious. His lewd comment to Giles when he encounters Buffy and Giles hanging around the woods together at lovers’ lane is funny and yucky.

Giles’s use of obscure British derogatory term ‘Pillock’ when describing Cain.

Larry’s confession to Xander and the whole mix up over what was really being said.


Why it sucks

The hulking bipedal werewolf costume with animatronic face is not that great. Still, it is infinitely better than the series’ later redesign which turns poor Oz in to some kind of rubbish loping chimp.

No Spike and Dru.

It's Buftastic

Oz waking up naked in the woods. He looks at himself, looks around and utters merely, “Huh!”

Dialogue to die for

Willow: It is nice. He's great. We have a lot of fun. But I want smoochies!
Buffy: Have you dropped any hints?
Willow: I've dropped anvils.

Giles: Quite. And it, uh, acts on pure instinct. No conscience, uh, uh, predatory and, and aggressive.
Buffy: In other words, your typical male.
Xander: On behalf of my gender, hey!
Giles: Yes, let's not jump to any conclusions.
Buffy: I didn't jump. I took a tiny step, and there conclusions were.

Oz (on the phone): Aunt Maureen. Hey, it's me. Um, what? Oh! It's, uh... actually its healing okay. That's pretty much the reason I called. Um, I wanted to ask you something. Is Jordy a werewolf? Uh-huh. And how long has that been going on? Uh-huh. What? No, no reason. Um... Thanks. Yeah, love to Uncle Ken.

Willow: Well, I like you. You're nice and you're funny. And you don't smoke. Yeah, okay, werewolf, but that's not all the time. I mean, three days out of the month I'm not much fun to be around either.

Giles (behind Cain’s back): Pillock!

And another thing

At the beginning of the episode, Oz is staring at the cheerleading statue in which Catherine Madison was trapped in Season 1 ep ‘Witch’. Amy Madison returns in the next episode.

How many stakes?

This puppy is something to howl about. 4 (out of 5)

Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Season 1, Episode 8 'I Robot, You Jane'

What a load of old Moloch(s)


Writer: Ashley Gable, Thomas A Swyden
Director: Stephen Posey

What's the sitch?
Willow becomes involved in an online relationship with someone she thinks is the perfect boy...only to find out it is in fact an evil demon looking to use her (and other teenagers) for its own dark purposes.

What's the sitch beneath the sitch?
This is one of the most glaringly obvious metaphor shows Buffy has ever done. Beware internet predators posing as kids. Of course, in the Buffyverse online predators are replaced by an ancient demon looking to use kids to help manifest itself through modern technology.

Who's giving us the wiggins this week?
Malcolm aka Moloch the Destroyer

Why it rocks
1. Willow takes centre stage. Put Willow in danger and you guarantee grabbing the audience. Ally Hannigan's big soulful eyes and trembling lip does it every time.

2. We meet Jenny Calender (Robia La Morte) for the first time, Sunnydale High's computer studies teacher. She'll play a major role over the next year or so. Plus she makes a great love interest/foil for Giles.

Why it sucks
It just ain't very good. Though the notion of demons inhabiting the internet is an interesting one, it just isn't scary. And the monster, Moloch, ends up looking ridiculous. Oh yeah, and the image of glassy eyed teens tapping away for hours at keyboards might be a nice comment on modern life but in the context of an exciting horror/comedy/drama show it leaves much to be desired. Consider this episode a file ready for deletion.

It's Buftastic
Um, when it's over?

Dialogue to die for
Ms. Calendar: "You're here again? You kids really dig the library, don't you?"
Buffy: "We're literary."
Xander: "To read makes our speaking English good."

And another thing
Did I mention this one ain't much good? Move along, move along...

How many stakes?
It's a wilting one. 1 (out of 5)